When we are very young we think "Someday I'LL be in school. . .junior high. . . high school. . . college." And one-by-one all of those somedays come and then they go. They pass by so quickly. In the midst of them, especially when they are full of hard somedays, they seem to go by slowly. Yet, even in their hardest moments, time never freezes, the next someday is eagerly on its way.
I don't remember when I started thinking about the somedays of getting married and having children, but I dreamt of them often.
"Someday I will be the bride."
"Someday I will live in my own house."
"Someday I will be pregnant."
"Someday I will be a mother."
I laid awake in bed the other night (which is foolish anyways because of how valuable sleep is, but who am I kidding, my sweetheart went to bed like a perfect angel an hour ago & I stayed up to bake a cake and blog)...anyways, back to the blog...I laid awake thinking about all of these somedays and how this huge someday of being a wife and mother is here. I am living in my "someday". My husband was asleep next to me and yet I could very clearly remember the time when I didn't know who my husband would one day be. And in the room right next to ours my precious little Lydia Jane slept peacefully. I think what spurred on all this thought was the annual Rake 'N Run Lee does with the junior highers. It was this past Saturday. Last year during the rake 'n run, I was home alone with a cold, took a pregnancy test, and discovered a baby was on the way. So here I am a year later and that little terrifying set of lines is now this perfect, little, precious somebody who I literally cannot get enough of.
I am trying desperately to savor each day and moment--so much that sometimes it is hard to even lay her down for a nap instead of holding her--because I know her somedays will be here so quickly and someday she will be putting her own precious little somebody down for a nap.
Now if only my "someday I will be done with school" would get here a little more quickly.